Author: Paper Boundaries - Page 4

Visitation – planning, games, conversations

Posted by Paper Boundaries | Jan 31, 2018 | Uncategorised |

What is visitation and how can you get the most out of it? Visitation can be very restrictive. For example, I talk with my daughter once a month via video-conference and visit Japan once a year. My ex-wife’s new husband is always present. He directly interferes with my daughter during visitations and interrupts special moments. This is a common boundary for alienated parents. Therefore, it is important to plan visitations and maximise all contact. I want this to be a positive post. My previous post about mediation was negative, so I want to make up for it. This post’s...

Introduction to mediation

Posted by Paper Boundaries | Jan 22, 2018 | Uncategorised |

Mediation crash course Disclaimer I had a really bad experience with mediation so I’m going to be pretty negative about it. I hope that when reading this, people can respect how it is possible for mediation to be a really good option if both parties participate in good faith. When and why? Mediation was mandatory for my circumstances. As soon as Japan’s Central Authority approved my application under the Abduction Convention, I was offered five free, monthly mediation sessions. I was excited and optimistic about my prospects. In theory, mediation is a great idea, if both parents can cooperate....

Data security tips and tricks

Posted by Paper Boundaries | Jan 17, 2018 | Uncategorised |

Data security for left behind parents In my previous post I detailed how I lost a lot of precious photos. Now, I want to share some practical data security tips on how to keep your data private and secure. This is an increasingly important issue because platforms such as Facebook encourage you to add as many ‘friends’ as possible and share as much as possible. Also, unless you are a target, e-mail security usually just means having an okay password and not clicking on phishing links. The thing is… what do you do when your attacker knows all of...

Our daughter’s abduction – the role of technology

Posted by Paper Boundaries | Jan 14, 2018 | Uncategorised |

This post is very personal because it details how our daughter was abducted. Before I start, it will become apparent that I haven’t provided any names, or my exact whereabouts. My reasoning isn’t that I am hiding anything. Rather, as Gavin Maxwell put it in Ring of Bright Water: …because identification in print would seem in some sense a sacrifice, a betrayal of its remoteness and isolation, as if by doing so I were to bring nearer its enemies of industry and urban life. In my opinion, the internet and digital interference played a big role in our daughter’s...

Abduction 101 – what is parental child abduction?

Posted by Paper Boundaries | Dec 25, 2017 | Uncategorised |

What is parental child abduction? The concept of parental child abduction can be quite challenging to explain without rambling, so I will try my best. An ex-colleague told me that a mother cannot abduct their child because children belong to them. They then chased me around the office with a dictionary definition of ‘abduct’. The definition was along the lines of removing somebody illegally by force or deception. She heckled that this definition made the concept insulting to her and impossible. I left it there because we were at work and I hadn’t shared my personal circumstances with them....